The honeymoon period of any marriage or relationship does have a certain shelf life. But just because that is the case, does it mean that you can’t have a happy marriage or get those butterfly excited feelings again, like you once had? If that is the kind of relationship that you want to have, then it can certainly happen. And all marriages go through patches that are a little rough. The key is to remember to put your spouse first, especially during rougher times, so that you can both come out of the other side feeling much more positive about things.
When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, it can be easy to get into the mundane routine of life. The excitement of seeing each other after work each day can easily change to a pack on the cheek, to not even really noticing the other is home if you’re not careful. So recognizing when you’re in that routine, and mixing things up a little, is important. Show appreciation to your spouse, and don’t just expect them to do certain things as it is part of the routine. Remind yourself why you appreciate your partner too. When you all feel connected and appreciated, it goes a long way in our relationships.
It can be hard to be honest all of the time, especially if there is something that you are ashamed about. You might have maxed out a credit card or spent a little too much this past month. But be honest about it. When it comes to you paying for things down the line that you can’t afford or applying for loans, this kind of thing can have an impact, especially when it is a while later. So be honest in all that you do with your spouse. If you are finding it tough, then looking to attend licensed couples therapy could be an option, simply as there is someone else there to mediate. When you’re not honest, you’re in the danger zone.
Focus on Mutual Goals
Having some of the same goals and things that you want to be working towards is key for a marriage. You don’t have to have everything aligned, but a few aspects of your life, such as your faith, family ideals, or career goals, could be the same. So, you can cheer each other on and help each other to get where you want to be, and to enjoy those aspects of your relationship. You don’t have to enjoy the same hobbies or ways to spend time, as long as you have the same or similar end goals.
Watch Your Words
When you share your innermost feelings with your other half, it can be hurtful when they are used against you. So you need to be careful about the things that you say, especially when said in rage. Be kind, be sensitive, and don’t do anything that will purposely hurt your other half. Instead, take a step back, and realize why you were thinking about saying it. What other issue needs to be resolved?